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3 simple words that could save your life – part 2 of 3

September 9, 2014 — 1 Comment

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As the adage goes ‘no man is an island…’ and don’t we know it to be true! Whilst every human being is unique and valuable it is also true that we are not able to exist entirely on our own.

In part one of this three-part-post we explored the concept of I. We discussed questions of identity, personal value and life purpose (if you haven’t already, you can read part one here). In this post I want to look at the second of my three life saving words to further explore a simple yet profound truth about what you and I really NEED. But, before we begin let me remind you of the journey we are all on and reiterate why I’m writing these posts in the first place:

“If you are ever conflicted about your existence, especially to the point of thinking that it’s not worth living I want you to remember these three words – I  N E E D  H E L P . Say them out loud, to others and to yourself. Say them louder, again and again especially if you think that others have not seen you, heard you or understood you. And keep saying them for as long as your life depends on it. These three words might just save your life. – I   N E E D   H E L P !” 

So let’s continue the conversation – NEED.

I  W A N T  T O  D I S A P P E A R

I love going out to listen to bands. Something special occurs when people get together to feel the raw emotion of live music and engage in a couple of hours of hero-adulation. The musicians, the crowd, the venue and the music all intertwine to create something of a spiritual experience for me. It’s more than a ‘gig’. There’s a connection that occurs, or at least that’s what I think is going on.

I recently got to see one of my favourite Australian artists, and as I stood there and listened to her music with about a thousand other admirers I began to think about how great her life must be. I mean she gets to experience this feeling, this connection, as part of her every day working life!

She began to share something of her story and how it informed the next song she was about to perform. I listened as she completely dismantled my perception of her life. She talked about loneliness, disconnect and feeling ‘invisible’ a lot of the time. She then performed a song inspired by her celebrity musician existence that tells the tale of having many admirers, but few real friends – long flights, always away from home, she lamented

‘If one more person looks through me I could disappear… It could be sweet release, but I don’t want to cry, not here…’ – Kate Miller-Heidke, Nightflight

I looked around the room and people nodded with solace as if to identify with every word she said.

It seems my favourite celebrity muso is not that different to the everyday regular person. People today are more connected than ever. With the click of a button we can discover personal information about pretty much anyone. There are over a billion active FB users worldwide, hundreds of millions active Twitter users, over three billion hits a day on YouTube… LinkedIn, Google Plus, Instagram, Pinterest, Tumblr… the list goes on (and some people still use MySpace!?). But for all this connection and ability to engage with the world around us it seems we are not much better off. Some of the biggest challenges facing people in the 21st century stem from issues related to loneliness and isolation. It would seem that despite of our over connected technologically obsessed society, many within it feel completely… and utterly… INVISIBLE. Just like my favourite artist, we are surrounded by crowds of people and the more that others look through us, the more we feel like we are disappearing.

connected and lonelyI  S E E  Y O U

So when did we shift from being a culture that esteemed the worth of people and become a society where people are consumed, accumulated and ignored? And more importantly how can we recover from this? Maybe we could learn a thing or two from cultures that seem to do this better. Perhaps the best way to ensure that people don’t feel invisible is to truly ‘see them’.

I love how Zulu people exchange these words upon greeting. One says Sawubona, (I see you) the other says Ngikhona (I am here). Some things are lost in a literal translate of this conversation, because what is actually being said in the midst of this exchange is,

until you saw me I did not exist.

Seeing people is more than just looking at them. To really see someone is to recognise that what stands before us more than just flesh, and blood and bones. Seeing people requires an intentional and honest look into the life and being of another human. It’s more than a passing glance, its pausing long enough to be present to those who are before us, to acknowledge their value simply because they ‘are’. Here’s the thing, when we truly see another person, we give them permission to see us and then begin to connect in quite a profound way. Perhaps that’s how it’s supposed to be?

W O L F  P A C K

We humans are highly social beings, pack-animals if you like, and I don’t believe it was ever intended that we live in isolation. A large portion of personal meaning is discovered in belonging, so it comes as no surprise that without positive interpersonal connection we’re bound to struggle. It has been well documented that loneliness is one of the most significant issues in our day and time. More people, young and old report as feeling isolated and lonely than in any other point in history.

Whilst food, water and oxygen might keep our heart beating and our physical well-being in tact, it would be fair to say that these essential elements on their own are simply not enough to sustain us. We NEED meaningful contact with others, friends, relatives, even contact with strangers is important.

Developing meaningful connections can be a complicated business and this is all the more reason to ensure that we are intentional with our efforts. In a recent visit to Australia Dr. Daniel Sweeney (George Fox University, USA) was asked what do people need in order to connect meaningfully and belong. His response,

Everyone needs to know that someone is  H E R E  (present to them in body and mind).

That someone is  L I S T E N I N G  (fully attentive to them).

That someone  U N D E R S T A N D S  them (identifies with them and their circumstances).

And that someone  C A R E S  (demonstrates like or love of them in some way by their response).

In other words what we really need to know from our interactions with others is

“I see you. I hear you. I understand you. I care for you.” We all NEED this.

need

A strong relational connection to an individual or community is crucial to everyone’s health and well-being. You might be ok as far as a roof over your head, food for your belly, stuff in your garage, but if you are struggling with thoughts of suicide and self-harm it’s definitely time to revisit your relationships and broader community connections. We all NEED to belong, especially when we’re struggling. And when we’re not struggling we NEED to see, hear, understand and extend care toward others. It’s confronting to think that we might be just what someone else needs to survive their current circumstances, but I suspect it is true more often than we realise.

In my final post in this series I will look at what it means to offer and receive HELP, but for now it’s over to you. Where do you find positive connection and belonging? How is this NEED met for you and how do you meet that need for others? I’m always interested in your thoughts!

BK

If you’re in need of immediate support or medical assistance call 000, or contact:

Lifeline    |    Beyond Blue    |    Man Therapy    |    Kids Help Line    |    Headspace

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3 simple words that could save your life – part 1 of 3

September 2, 2014 — 6 Comments

BLOG_IneedHelpBannerThe recent suicide of Robin Williams is tragic on so many levels. Many have written reported and commented on the details regarding his struggle with depression compounded by his recent diagnosis of Parkinson’s disease. My heart breaks for Robin and his family and I cannot begin to imagine what they must be feeling right now. I do not wish to add further comment to the circumstances surrounding Robin Williams death, but needless to say a life lost to suicide is always tragic.

This phenomenon is not isolated to Hollywood e-news. When we look a little closer to home we see that at least six Australians end their lives every single day.

That’s 42 every week.

183 every month.

A whopping 2190 people take their own life every year.

I am not a therapist, counselor or health professional. I am not qualified in the formal sense to dish out advice to those who are really struggling (incidentally if that is you please stop reading and contact your nearest health professional or helpline). But for the record I find it heartbreaking to think that anyone should feel so helpless, hopeless and worthless that they would want to end their lives. I am not ok with suicide and I’m not about to accept that this social scourge cannot be different.

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Stats source: beyondblue, Suicide Information Paper, 2012 (Internal Document) cited on http://www.mantherapy.org.au/man-facts/man-stats

You see I have stood at the graveside of people who have ended their life. I have also found people who were in the process of attempting suicide. I have attended the funerals of young people for whom it became all too much, and also visited with communities and families who are dealing with the reality of this devastating occurrence.

No matter which way you look at it suicide is all too common in our culture and the effects are far reaching and devastating.

It seems that as long as life exists there will always be people who want to end it on their own terms. But… what if it didn’t have to be that way? I want to suggest that there are some simple words that can make the difference between life and death. Three powerful little words that can be a pivot point toward freedom a and a gate through which healing can be sought.

If you are ever conflicted about your existence, especially to the point of thinking that it’s not worth living I want you to remember these three words. Say them out loud, to others and to yourself. Say them louder, again and again if you think that others have not heard you. And keep saying them for as long as your life depends on it. The three words?

I  N E E D  H E L P

So lets start with – ‘I’

Humans have been asking ‘Who am I?’ for as long as they have existed. For the person that is finding life especially difficult this question plays like an iTunes track on repeat. The dulcet tones of negative self-speak ring louder and louder the longer they’re left unattended and at the centre of this script are the core questions of personal identity, value and purpose. Whilst there are many variations to the words we might use, in one way or another we are essentially all asking the same few questions.

10455700_10153074533941959_9054346836794167956_nW H A T  A M  I  L I K E ?

We can’t help but compare ourselves to others as we endeavor to better understand the self. This is not all bad, however when we do this we risk missing the incredible beauty, creativity and capacity that exists within each individual. Perspective is useful, but measuring our own sense of self in comparison to others can be risky business. Inevitably we begin to notice the best of others and weigh it up against the worst of ourselves and ultimately we can begin to take on attributes of others that are not indicative to our true self. The result of this is this? The I (that is you) dies a little bit more each moment until you are left with very little.

I’ve addressed this more thoroughly in my previous short video post Create or Copy, but for what it’s worth,

“You are a full colour one-off original, be careful not to become a second rate grey-scale version of everyone else.”

W H A T  A M  I  W O R T H ?

I do not believe that personal value is as subjective as many would argue. In my humble opinion every life is priceless because it is a life – your life, my life and every other person on the planet. We fight for life because we know that life is valuable. People, governments and corporations spend billions of dollars on health care and biomedical sciences, because life is valuable. A rational healthy human exhibits a desire to live and will do everything they can to preserve that life and the lives of others around them, because life is valuable. You are valuable beyond measure, even (some would say especially) when you don’t feel as though it is true.

W H A T  C A N  I  D O ?

If your basic premise is that I don’t matter, then it follows that what I do does not matter. This could not be further from the truth. Every person has a contribution to make to others around them and therefore the world at large. Part of the problem is that we frequently confuse our purpose (and therefore our meaning) with the expectations of our culture. I’ve heard it said that the grand narrative of our culture is this:

You WORK… in order to ACCUMULATE… so that you can CONSUME… then you DIE.

That’s it. Nothing more nothing less. Kind of depressing if you ask me.

10626564_10153312687311959_397179055589727105_nEven those who conquer this pattern of living still struggle with their own sense of self. Note where and with whom this post began!? Some of the most competent, wealthy, and successful people on the planet are the most desperate, lonely and lost. It stands to reason that here has got to be a better way. If it is true that we crave the opposite outcome for our lives, then perhaps there is good sense in a counter-cultural approach to living. What if we flipped this way of doing-life on its head?

That is rather than simply ‘working’ we pursue our true V O C A T I O N.

Rather than earning just to accumulate money and possessions we are G E N E R O U S with our lives and our stuff.

Rather than consuming as much as we can we could endeavor to C O N T R I B U T E  to the needs of others and the world at large.

And perhaps then at the end of our earthly existence we don’t just die, but we are far more likely to leave a lasting L E G A C Y that continues to have a positive effect long after we’re gone.

Now that sounds like a life worth living. Not easy, not trouble free, but certainly meaningful and a far cry away from the devastating place of ‘I don’t matter’.

At our best we know that there is incredible value in I. We generally believe that I matter, that I am unique to others and this is good. We inherently know that I am valuable, that I can and do make a positive contribution to others and the world at large. We know that I can live a fulfilling and purposeful life.

But when this script changes so does our overall well-being. We lose our sense of identity, value and purpose and at that point we are not left with much. At our worst we begin to think that I am not worth fighting for, that I am a hassle to those around me and that I may as well not exist. The I becomes inconsequential and irrelevant… Heartbreaking.

BLOG_IneedHelp I.002We need to recover the value of I and in doing so address our existential crises through a lense of hope rather than a lense of despair. So next time you find yourself pondering the question ‘who am I?’ and its many variations, remember:

“I am valuable beyond measure.”

“I am worth the effort to live a full and healthy life.”

“I can do whatever it takes, whatever is needed, for as long as it takes to get there. And that is one of the best contributions I can make to this world right now.”

If the I seems less than valuable to you right now please hear this – the I matters… and by I… I mean YOU.

You are valuable, you are wanted, you are loved, and you need to be here. This is why you must speak up, say it loud, say it again, say it even louder –  I  N E E D  H E L P .

Those three simple words may just save your life.

In part two of this three part post I want to address our NEED for experiencing positive connection and belonging. But for now, hit me with your thoughts. How do you understand the elusive I? How and where do you find personal meaning and purpose? I’m keen to hear your thoughts.

BK

If you’re in need of immediate support or medical assistance call 000, or contact:

Lifeline    |    Beyond Blue    |    Man Therapy    |    Kids Help Line    |    Headspace

Create or Copy

June 16, 2013 — 5 Comments

It isn’t easy to be true to ourselves. I know this first-hand. It seems everyone has an opinion as to how we should behave, what we should think and who we ought to be. Sometimes these opinions are loud and obvious, but more often than not they’re subtle, yet relentless. Think about it; the music we listen to, the movies we see, the experiences we pursue, the friends we keep… they all play a part in shaping who we are, and can therefore also say something about the person that we want to be known as. I mean, do we really believe that our true self is valuable and worth discovering anymore?

I’d love to know what you think… Enjoy the vid!

BK

The counsel of the wise…

November 6, 2012 — Leave a comment

As a child my grandfather educated me in the ways of the track. His advice was clear, simple, and straight to the point “Don’t gamble, you won’t win”. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. He was a bookmaker. His wealth (or lack of it) depended on the highs and lows of a day at the track. It was either an exhilarating day of triumph and conquest or an anxiety pit driven by the hope of a win that would put things right. That said, as a bookmaker he usually came out on top.

I can’t help but wonder just what my grandfathers earnings (my future inheritance) represents. I wonder how many families suffered because of the addict that bet on great-odds with my grandfather? I wonder how many groceries weren’t bought, how many relationships dissolved, how many jobs were lost, how many drinks were drunk, and how many people took their lives because of the pain of searing loss? Whilst I have no control over this, I am a little more aware of what occurs in the world of the gambler. This is mostly because my grandfather who made a living from an industry that is set up to cost the consumer more than their money, used to say to me with complete conviction “Don’t gamble, you won’t win”.

If only he understood the wisdom of his counsel. When I think of the gambling industry in Australia, and especially the five hundred million dollars Aussies will spend at the track today, I wonder just what is it we are gambling? Study after study tells us that the effects of such an event are just not positive. Crime rates increase, alcohol related violence increases, sexual assault rates increase, drink driving charges increase, hospital and emergency admissions increase, and all for what? The opportunity for a day at the races and the possibility of making a quick buck? Again… the prophetic words of my grandfather ring in my ears “Don’t gamble, you won’t win”.

Whilst the juxtaposition of a bookmaker telling a child not to gamble is somewhat confusing, it does make a very bold statement.

“At his core, my grandfather knew the evils of the gambling industry well. He was taunted by them and yet at the same time strangely dependent upon them”.

He wanted his grandson to know better and to not live in the same struggle. He was an elder advising a student in the school of life and the more I think about it that little piece of advice I am convinced it is just as relevant to every sphere of society. To the individual, to the family, to the local community, to the state and the nation, “Don’t gamble, you won’t win”. The costs associated with this day and the gambling industry at large are big, probably far bigger than we care to admit.

Friends, we’ve heard it said that the counsel of the wise brings life, so please heed my grandfathers warning. He lived with the tension as one entrenched in a system that he knew was ultimately damaging. Families… please listen to his counsel… Communities, please understand the breadth of the impact… Australia, please consider the story we are writing and the huge cultural implications that ensue.

We call it the race that stops a nation. It is frightening just how true that is, on so many levels.

BK

My big little secret

November 4, 2012 — 2 Comments

It might shock you, but I have been foolish enough to carry a big little secret (or two) in my life.

  • There was the time that I accidentally vacuumed up part of a deceased persons ashes and then proceeded to do my best to cover it up.
  • Then there was the time I stole a friends watch and pretended that someone gave me one just like it.
  • Then there was the time that I hurt someone dear to me through a dishonest and deceitful act.
  • Then there was the time I had lied to others around me regarding a significant personal character issue.

All. Embarrassingly. True.

It would be easy for me to write this post and focus on all the public figures that have been caught out living a lie in recent times. Who would blame me? Celebrities are often very easy prey. Their lives are out there for the world to see feeding our insatiable appetite for peering into the private lives of others, and indeed we feast when they appear to be failing.

This need to see others at their most broken has always intrigued me. I mean, if I want to look deep into a life that has a history of wrong doing, deception, and foolishness I need look no further than my own life. I suspect many of us could say the same. Why look to others? The answer to this is rather simple,

focussing on the foolishness of others takes the focus away from my own failings and insecurities, and for that moment I am deceived into thinking that I am somehow better, especially better than the likes of (insert latest celebrity failure here…).

A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language.

It is amazing though how secrets seem to make a way out, even after a VERY long time in hiding. And the ramifications are usually dire. It would seem the longer one prolongs the inevitable uncovering of the truth, the greater the impact and long term effect. Little secrets have big consequences. One thing we can be sure of however, is that everyone has a secret. Whether it is a secret the size of a giant squid lurking beneath the surface of our lie ladened ocean with consequences stretching like tentacles into multiple areas of our life, OR, whether a simple personal and private faux-pa, it is fair to say that most people have a skeleton or two in the closet.

‘Big deal’ you might say…

‘So people have a few skeletons in the closet, what business is it of mine? If someone is stupid enough to take performance enhancing drugs, lie about it, and then get caught, they deserve everything that’s coming… why waste time on this? why does this matter?’

If only it were that simple. Whether we like it or not our actions have far reaching consequences – good or bad. They have a direct effect on ourselves, on those closest to us, on that which we represent, and also on the culture we form.

1.  Every culture is formed by the collective stories of the people that make up that culture.

Think about it… when your life and experiences combine with the lives and experiences of others, a bigger experience (or story) is formed. Whilst it is possible to live a totally isolated and disconnected life, when we do participate in life with others we develop common threads and common points of connection. For example, in the early days of Australian settlement convicts would support each other as they faced mistreatment and discipline by the authorities. the Aussie spirit of supporting the underdog began and today we still take great pride in supporting the ‘Aussie-battler’, those who are fighting against the odds. How we understand and experience each other (and ultimately ourselves) completely informs the culture we develop. So it stands to reason that;

When the stories of the individuals don’t represent the truth of their existence, our collective story becomes distorted. This means that (culturally speaking) we become influenced by things that just aren’t real.The result of this is that cultures develop patterns of operating, systems, expectations, and social norms that inevitably encourage others to become distorted images of their true selves as well.

Think about the effects of this on our families, our society, our organisations, our businesses, our churches and our communities. In the case of Lance Armstrong people the world over celebrated a man who had ‘achieved the impossible’, who had overcome great odds and who then earned millions of dollars telling that story. And many aspired to do the same. Of course this actually was impossible – even for the one who had supposedly done these things!

2.  It’s never just the wrong-doer that is affected by their poor behaviour, the action becomes another reason to not trust what it is they represent.

Many have said they can never trust another champion cyclist – in their mind the sport of cycling has been forever tarnished as a result of Armstrong’s dishonesty. The same can be said for anyone that has knowingly misrepresented themselves.

  • For the politicians who do a backflip on policy promises – yet again it proves that politicians and political systems can’t be trusted…
  • the minister that is stood down for moral failings – another reason for people to never trust the church…
  • the CEO that didn’t pay their taxes – another name on the list of greedy business owners…
  • the wife that cheats on her husband – further proof that the institution of marriage is doomed. You get my point.

On the other hand, people and cultures that practice honesty and truthfulness, are freed of the shame of their failings and can cultivate a future based on possibility. Their personal (and collective) story is usually one of humility, openness, grace, acceptance and healing. Such cultures have a more accepting view of people and society, and therefore they’re better equipped and better placed to develop forward (rather than simply trying to maintain that which is not real). Consider for a moment the incredible healing that has begun for Australia as a nation and our indigenous people after the Prime Ministers ‘sorry speech’. On this particular issue there is a long way to go, but that moment which acknowledged all that was wrong, covered up, and misrepresented marked the beginning of restoration for many individuals (some would say a whole country) affected through the events of the stolen generation.

3.  It may be cliche but I still believe that ‘honesty is the best policy’

Admitting we have done the wrong thing and then living as though we mean it is not only better for individuals, it is better for relationships, families, communities, cultures and humanity at large! In old school terms we call it confession and repentance – not simply a discipline for the Christian, it is just good plain and simple common sense. There is healing in the sharing of secrets. That shame, that embarrassment, that pain… it can be dealt with – I’m living proof of that. The writer of James put it this way…

“…confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” James 5:16 (TNIV)

I happen to believe that God wants us to be free of our secrets, what ever it is. This is not a free pass form the consequences of our actions, but it is a promise of freedom from a God that is first and foremost about grace. There is healing in sharing our secrets. So… before we jump to pointing the finger at the likes of Lance Armstrong, Peter Slipper, Arnold Schwarzenegger or whoever else you might like to add, we would do well to pause and remember the time we made a mess of things. It is for times such as these that these words were penned…

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 (TNIV)

So… What’s your big little secret? Might I suggest that now is the time to fess up and begin the work of healing? If you’re brave enough, start right now. Tell someone. If you’re really brave, you can tell us right here, right now and comment below.

BK

What I learned from Ron Burgundy, Fashion Week and the Bible

October 23, 2012 — Leave a comment

As a naïve young punk (which was many years ago now) I visited a designer label store on Southbank. I spotted some fantastic looking clothes in a shop window and decided that they were worth a closer look. I could see the shop assistants inside the store and therefore figured the shop was open. I went to the shop door and then realised it was locked. I managed to catch the shop assistants eye and she came to the door looking a little jaded. She hesitantly opened the door, looked down her immaculately manicured nose and spoke to me in the most pretentious tone, ‘Do you have an appointment?’ she said. I looked back at her completely confused and asked ‘Why? Do the clothes have somewhere to go?’ Needless to say, she was NOT impressed.

It is fair to say that I have since developed in my appreciation of fashion (at least a little bit). Let me be clear… I am not a model, I am not a fashionista, I’m not wealthy enough to buy designer labels, and I am not someone who follows closely the glamorous world of catwalks and haute couture. I do however believe that everybody can and should shout the immortal words uttered by Will Ferrell’s narcissistic fictional character Ron Burgundy,

“I look goooood… I mean really good… Hey everyone, come and see how good I look!”

Let me explain. The fashion industry gets a pretty bad wrap, and to be fair, at times it probably deserves it. It isn’t always respectful of social conventions and has unhelpfully perpetuated significant social issues. But, like many significant cultural phenomena that has been distorted over time, it actually has positive and humble beginnings.

1) Fashion as art

The first recorded fashionista was Englishman Charles Frederick Worth, who lived and worked out of Paris. Revolutionizing how dressmaking had been previously perceived, Worth made it so the dressmaker became the artist of garnishment: or as we have come to know them – a fashion designer.

While he created one-of-a-kind designs to please some of his titled wealthy customers (including royalty), he is best known for preparing a portfolio of designs that were shown on live models. Invited guests would inspect his handiwork, make their selection, specify colours and fabrics, and have a duplicate garment tailor-made in his workshop.

Worth moved fashion from simple dressmaking to art-design. For Worth, fashion became an expression of creativity intended to enhance ones beauty. As a result, consumers began to look to him to decide what was worthy of purchase.

2) Fashion as confidence builder

The first Fashion Week event took place in 1943 in New York City. In the midst of World War II the fashion industry was unable to travel to France and invest in the current trends of Paris. Fashion publicist Eleanor Lambert created “Press Week” to direct attention to affordable American innovations and fashions in New York. Whilst it was an opportune time to distract buyers away from the dominant Parisian fashion industry, it was also an attempt to build confidence into people (during a time of war and economic challenge) by showcasing affordable and attractive clothing.

People felt good about themselves, they could still demonstrate something of their unique beauty. They weren’t just victims of circumstance, they were ‘people’, and their clothes helped them communicate this.

Needless to say the success of the week spread like wildfire, and since then many have followed suit.

It would seem that what people wear has the potential to build them up and enhance their spirit. It also has the potential to confuse ones perspective of self-worth and personal value. The difference? We must keep our attitudes toward clothing and our understanding of self in their right place. Fashion should seek to serve the self, and not the other way around.

So how can we avoid this common pitfall? It may seem obvious but I’d suggest we need to remember…

1)    Beauty is never just skin deep

It was Mark Twain who said

“Clothes make the man, naked people have little to contribute to society.”

Not sure that I totally agree with that. Metaphorically speaking, a ‘naked person’ i.e. one who does not hide behind garments – is transparent, honest, truthful, open, and real. In short their personal character is more important than their clothes. A person who lives like this will probably make anything they wear look good! You don’t simply wear these things, you are these things. Clothes can’t replace or alter ones personal integrity or true nature.

2)    What you wear does not determine who you are

The fashion industry can be guilty of dictating our clothing preferences, and in extreme cases it dictates the shape of the body that wears them.

Clothes were once designed and made to fit people. The unfortunate tale of today is that our culture is sometimes guilty of trying to make people to fit clothes.

Beauty, colour, light and life exists in every person, regardless of shape and size. We ought to dress in a way that allows these inherent attributes shine and never believe that we are somehow unable to do so. By allowing the fashion industry to dictate your shape, decisions and value you begin to distort the truth of the beauty that is you. I happen to believe…

You are enough.

You are valuable beyond measure.

You are known.

You are loved.

The universe was clothed in colour, beauty and wonder at the beginning of time, and the Creator’s refrain was ‘it is good… it is good… it is good…’ Then, speaking of humanity created in God’s own image it was said ‘it is very good!’ If you like, God looked at His creation and in a moment of delight shouted ‘Hey everybody… come and see how good I look!’ By all means dress well and take pride in your appearance, but more importantly understand who you are and whose you are.

The Creator’s delight in creation has not changed, and when we are able to look deep into our being and see the beauty wonder and presence of God our appearance takes on a very different meaning… few things trump the beauty of a person who is seen through the eyes of the Creator. It is possible to see ourselves and others in this way and I imagine the world might be a very different place if we were intentional about this.

So… whether you are known to be a fashionista, for your fashion-faux-pas, or anywhere in between, may you embrace the truth of the Creators refrain and give rise to the beauty that is you.

BK

So… I’m going to blog.

January 8, 2012 — Leave a comment

So… I’m going to blog.

Mainly because I have a huge number things running through my mind at any given time and for my own sanity I need to do something with these thoughts, but also because I think some things ought to be said. You might find some of these thoughts interesting (Lord knows they amuse me!), and I’m sure you will find some of it just plain boring. Either way I’d welcome your conversation and reflections, so feel free to stop by from time to time and say hi. I promise to do my best to give you a reason to keep coming back 😉